Wednesday, May 6, 2015

RPG Psycho Pretty Pissed About Druggy Slug Man D&D, Reasons Unknown

Has--Watch Out World--Asian Friends

RPGnet commenter "hippokrene" has announced his or her friends would be not at all pleased with David McGrogan's independently-released and critically acclaimed dark fantasy setting Yoon-Suin.
The reasons for Hippokrene's displeasure with the Moorcock-inflected crabman-infested fictional place were left unclear, though she or he appeared to believed that having "Asian friends" was not only unusual but somehow afforded him or her an enviably unique point of view on the thorny question of whether surreal dreamzones with man-yaks were legit.

More on the situation as it develops.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Stupidest Conversation In History of Games Begins

Designer Says All Games Hurt People, Remains Oddly Silent on Whether Lying About Rape Does

Noted loser and game designer Ben Lehman, best known for fabricating accusations about sexual violence in order to attack fellow designer-loser James "argues with spambots" Desborough began a conversation yesterday on Google Plus by claiming that all games are dangerous.

"Most art harms people, one way or another," claimed the rape-threat-faker "Games often harm their own audience, by giving them artificial desires and then frustrating those desires, or setting friends in competition against each other."

As the discussion progressed, Lehman provided both compelling evidence of his idea and a window into the disfunctional environment his own game design work spews forth from: "For personal example: my experience of Settlers of Catan is that it does real lasting harm to the friendships of people who play it. "

Thus far, Lehman's friends--best known for continuing to read Lehman and sometimes giving him money even after he proved himself to be either a frightening sociopath or a vindictive scam artist--responded by treating the post as if it was not a terrifying cry for help from a damaged mind.

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Indie Game Genius Wraps Head Around What Internet Has Been Telling Him For A Decade

"Maybe...People Don't Play Story Games Because They...Don't...Want...To?"

Longtime Story-Game diehard Alessandro Piroddi sent ripples throughout the Indie RPG community earlier this week with an article announcing that maybe people don't play games he likes because they like the games they like better.

Piroddi cited a variety of key differences between games his friends like and wrote and games they don't, including:

  • Games Alessandro likes require everyone to read the rules.
  • Better games don't.
  • Games Alessandro likes require everyone to learn whole new procedures just to play for a few hours only to find out the game is about milking a sheep.
  • Better games don't.
  • Games Alessandro likes require everyone to act like the GM or at least an Indie game nerd.
  • Better games let people relax and only take charge when they feel like it.
  • Games Alessandro likes are about bullshit like sad pirate choices.
  • Better games aren't.

terrified Indie scene reacted to Piroddi's announcement by continuing to be incredible assholes:

"...while from an armchair it looks like you'd only want to play rpgs if you were especially imaginative and had deep creative needs..." hypothesized one Eero Tuovinen, "in actual fact the people actually exercising the medium may simply be doing it out of habit, and due to accumulated experience overcoming personal leanings. Sort of like if you taught a child to play Chess at an early age, they might continue doing it despite it being out of character for their adult personality, simply because the game is so familiar and they're so good at it that the expertise enables them to enjoy it despite the natural handicap."

 "I think the question implicit here," said fellow Story Gamer Paul T "is not just "why don't modern games overtake older games", but "why don't modern overtake older games, given the well-known problems those games carry"?"

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

RPGnet Moderator Unsure If He Should Be Part of Hobby

"..there may in fact be no ethical way for me to pursue this hobby"

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Zak S/RPGPundit Verdict: It Was Funhaver Games

Game Company Contributors And Fans Promoted Fraudulent Accusations Against RPG Loudmouths

For a week, the role-playing game community has been wondering who or what cared so goddamn much about porn actor, painter and DM Zak S and RPGSite owner/opinion-mongerer RPGPundit that it bothered to smear them all over the internet when the Fifth Edition of Dungeons And Dragons was released with their names listed as contributors.
Look who's got no plusses….
Some asked: Was the controversy a sign of the times? Was it merely just desserts from years of inflammatory RPG blogging by the pair of prolific pontificators? Was it a consequence of the nature of the emergence of a new internet-influenced paradigm of cultural production? Was it a symptom of a larger toxicity in the Dungeons & Dragons community? It turns out that, no, it was a company called Funhaver Games.

Rather than just say what the rest of the RPG community said ("These two completely suck but they have good game ideas--sometimes--I guess. Hey read my blog I have a Shadowrun hack for Savage Worlds") the company--named in reaction to Lamentations of the Flame Princess author James Edward Raggi IV's essay "I Hate Fun" and associated with the ailing Nightfall kickstarter abandoned by admitted liar Bryan "Gau" Schwaderer--adopted a far more interesting response, imagining themselves seeing a cigar-smoking game reviewer beating up gay men in the street or fantasizing about being followed home by a wheelchair-pushing porn star missing half of his hair.
So he lied about money, and he lied about Zak …
…so why would you think he's lying again?

A glance at Funhaver's twitter following confirms a shockingly high proportion of the struggling game company's friends, allies and contributors have attacked TheRPGPundit, Zak, or both, including:

…along with an assorted bumper crop of those who have retweeted insulting things about the Lenny and Squiggy of RPGs*

When asked for comment, a spokesman for Funhaver replied "ArrgrhguggugglebargggleTry my Monsterhearts hack!"

(Zak is Squiggy)

Monday, April 28, 2014

Stupid Response To Stupid Review Of Stupid Product Sparks Stupid People To Do Stupid Things

Raggi Profits

Pointless argument ensued this week after the RPGpundit posted a pointlessly histrionic review of a pointless product, sparking a pointless reply by the pointless author, Geoffrey McKinney who pointlessly accused the reviewer of liking Dragonlance. The Pundit responded by pointlessly calling McKinney "Mr McRapeypants" and then asking the public if the bad and pointless things McKinney had done weren't somehow more bad and more pointless than the bad and pointless things he, the Pundit, himself had done did.
The utterly meh Isle of The Unknown prompted the vicious review that left the public struggling to give a fuck either way.
The Internet responded via pointless discussions and posts about the pointless controversy about the pointless hexcrawl supplement of which this article is one and--in some cases--by buying it. Which was, perhaps, the point.